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Reflection!


something got me wondering about which point of our life are we actually grown up? From what I have learnt so far, age has hardly anything to do with it. So what exactly are the milestones to growing up? Do we have to “Act” grown up inspite of feeling young and restless?

The reason for this I suppose is that we get hooked to a certain point or phase, sometimes events of our life that are defining points. After which we grow up in alternate ways. Mostly physical. Our mind stops evolving because there are issues we haven’t dealt with. Only after we achieve closure do we encourage free flow of thoughts and hence actions.

Does a 50 something year old person, who is issueless, been through bad string of relationships and is probably still living with himself, have to act the same way as a 50 something year old grandpa who dotes on his young grand children ???

Why do we expect people to behave “their age” when there is no appropriate age like behavior? Why do we get scandalized when the grandpa talks of sex. And if the same were to come from the single buzzing been there done that dude of 50 we take it as , his experiences!. We live in a hypocritical society and we too add to such irrational behavior.

Why do we always try to tame others to what we think they should be like. Why expect “appropriate” behavior? When we ourselves don't know what that is?

I had a fantastic conversation with a guy who was way above my league. Age wise speaking. And he too felt conscious of the age difference. He obviously must have his own reasons of wanting to meet up and socialize wit a girl half his age, or as he puts it “if I had a daughter she would be your age!”

My point is, even if he had a daughter, why is it impossible to have the same conversation. Why the bias? I didn’t see him to be a prospective lover or a sugar daddy, I was purely interested in knowing about his life and sharing experiences. But he on the other hand was stagnated at the age difference. It was obviously an issue for him. But he claimed it not to be so!

I obviously cant imagine having a conversation like the one I had with this guy, with my own father. Not because he is my father and I expect a certain form of artificial decency, but simply coz my dad s line of interest varies.. But I don't bias people according to their age. I happen to have many people his age to whom I pour out more than I should. acceptance is a virtue. i now believe.

Comments

  1. PaddySeptember 4, 2010 at 9:37 PM

    Hey, thanks for this nice blog picking up on another stigma in our society!

    I have always wondered why our culture has been imbued with suppression of emotions. The priority given to what one thinks about oneself vs what others think about oneself is reversed here. Though a certain level of social acceptance is required both in the east and the west, in the west, I feel, the requirement is less stringent allowing certain freedom for individualistic expressions.

    I have had friends who were in relationships with 50 yrs olds, and I am pretty sure they were there not preying on the older's wealth :-) - which as you know is also quite common!

    I think we have come a long way in the list of 'can dos' in our society and we will eventually get there. But I wouldn't expect the current 50 yr olds to freely come out of the closet and abandon their cliques.

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